For the love of Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, help her knock it off.
And help anyone else struggling with themselves…please, it doesn’t just hurt them.

Tell me what I’m doing wrong, there’s got to be something I can improve.

Oh, and I feel this REALLY strong calling to deaf education…I can’t shake it. Is that you? You want me to do that? Works for me if it works for you. I’m thinking it was you because it came from like nowhere.

I’m just trying to get in something new on here before I fall asleep.

For sleep regulation…it’s been weird lately.
For guidance for the doctors helping me.
For the people we talked about in wellness today. The ones who come back from Iraq or Afghanistan on leave, and kill themselves before they have to go back. For their families, and for their happiness.

For the people trying for perfection…that they try for excellence instead.

For help getting that 4.0 I need.

Thanks for everything. Life has been fine lately, just fine, pretty hilarious sometimes (I love my life), but I need a change…just a few new introductions…you know?

Thy Will Be Done,
Meg

Now I’m going to bed this second. So exhausted haha

For Julie – she wasn’t feeling so good today.

For everyone who has something against Regina…enlighten them.

I’m still disappointed in our generation, especially when they get in dumb fights on facebook. Maybe this is why I enjoy hanging with mom’s friends more than mine. Regardless, I just pray that emotional and mental maturity will come to them.

My mind is just…emptiness lately. Let’s try some journal prompts…

Heaven. What is it like?
I think there’s kind of an individualized heaven…like it’s perfect for everyone.
Like Solla Sollew…
There’s a faraway land,
So the stories all tell
Somewhere beyond the horizon
If we can find it
Then all will be well
Troubles there are few,
Someday we’ll go to

Solla sollew, solla sollew
Solla sollew, solla sollew

They say breezes are warm
There and people are kind
Maybe it’s something
Like heaven
I close my eyes
And i see in my mind
Skies of bluest blue
And i’m sure it’s true

Solla sollew, solla sollew
Solla sollew, solla sollew

I’ve had so much trouble
Finding my way there
When i get close,
It disappears
If i can get there,
I’m gonna stay there
If it takes me miles,
If it takes me years

High on a mountain
Or lost on the sea
Sooner or later
I’ll find it,
I have a picture
Of how it will be
On the day i do,
Troubles will be through
But i’ll be home with you

That pretty much sums it up.

There are only a few things that bother me in people: arrogance, talking too much, and arrogance. And talking too much. Don’t forget arrogance. But I know it’s been said that the faults you find in others are also in you, so it’s very possible I’m painstakingly arrogant, too.

Julie just told me about the girl they found in Haiti. No way she EVER could have made it without you. Some people tried to tell me no one could possibly be left alive under the rubble after all this time, but they must not now about the saving grace of God. BLESS THE LORD!!!!

Thy Will Be Done,
Meg

I can’t stop eating. When I get home…I just eat and eat and eat.
I keep telling stupid little lies, too, for no reason at all!
Help me, please. This prayer is for me.

I pray that I can be honest. Just be honest. That shouldn’t be as difficult as I make it.
Help me moderate myself when it comes to food. And to keep motivated with exercise and all that.
I also need your help focusing on school work. Shoot, I should be doing that right now…but I’m falling asleep…that reminds me…
Help me to stop making excuses and just take responsibility.
I ask for peace. Inner peace, contentment with myself, my past, my present, my future. But I also pray for the motivation to improve.
I feel so guilty everytime I spend money on anything…am I supposed to? are you trying to tell me something?

Now for everything else…
For the Atheists…that they can see what they’re missing
For the Lippert family, and the Beaumont and Gesu communities…they helped us when we lost Mary, now it’s our turn to support them.
For all of our teachers…that they find fantastic new jobs, or at least bearable new jobs.
For Sr. Seton…she does so much for others that we probably don’t see. She’s nice.

I’m very sleepy…good night.

Thy Will Be Done,
Meg

Why can’t I grow up?
Why do I keep starting arguments?
Why am I so pissy like 70% of the time?
“What is up with me lately?”

WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME, GOD?!

For all the behind-the-scenes people Julie mentioned.

Gosh, I don’t even know what to write here. My brain is still just…empty. I’m just empty. Just looking for something to fill up on.

Well, we couldn’t find THE water bottle but we found one! Hallelujah!

I
I l
I lo
I lov
I love
I love t
I love to
I love to d
I love to da
I love to dan
I love to danc
I LOVE TO DANCE!
I can only REALLY dance as long as nobody, NOBODY, is watching though. I feel it though, the energy, the emotion, it’s perfect…but I feel like I need to be skinny before I can take dance again. Does that sound right?

For guidance…in general.

For Margaret and Michael, and for the little boy we found in a rack of clothes (haha)…make sure he has a good life.

Now all glory to God, who is able to keep you from falling away and will bring you with great joy into his glorious presence without a single fault. All glory to him who alone is God, our Savior through Jesus Christ our Lord. All glory, majesty, power, and authority are his before all time, and in the present, and beyond all time! Amen. – Jude 1:24-25

“Dear Jesus,
Please hear my prayer. I go along each day, trying to run my life my own way. I forget to let go and give you control.

I wonder why things aren’t going the way I want them to go. I forget to stop and ask what you want, Lord. Please help me to give you control, Jesus. I want to follow you. I want what you desire for me.

Help me to realize that when you close one door, you open the one you want me to walk through. Help me also to realize that what I desire may not be what is meant for me, or what is best for me. Maybe it will lead me away from what your great plan is for me.

Lord, let me accept each day as a gift. Let me follow the path you choose for me. Help me to be thankful for what you give me and not to worry about my needs. I trust you will take care of all my needs. Remind me that my role is to care for those around me and focus on those who need my help.

Help me not to be judgmental, as we are all equal in God’s eyes. Help me to see the good in all of your creations. Let me leave the judging to you, dear Jesus. Instead, I will concentrate on living to please you!

Help me, dear Jesus, be who and what you want me to be. Give me strength, faith and hope, and most of all, give me guidance each and every day. I let go and give you control.

In Jesus name,

Amen.”
—-I didn’t write that, but I like it a lot.

“Hitch your wagon to a star.”

Here come the intentions…
For newly born babies, may they remain healthy and happy, and in a family that can afford to take care of him or her.
For the lonely…I hope they find consolation in you or a new, genuine friend
For the sick and their families
For the homeless
For everyone who has lost a loved one.
For the people with no one to pray for them
For all of my teachers
For those suffering from addictions.
For students in grad school.
For the American soldiers in Iraq. And the Iraqi soldiers in Iraq
For the depressed
For those with eating disorders

Gosh, my mind is so empty right now.

Thy Will Be Done,
Meg

For Maria, she just went to the nurse. Doesn’t feel good.

Why am I so irritable lately? It’s like I can’t stand repetitive noises, some people’s voices, the squeaky noise the printer in the library makes when it’s printing, loud noises, the way some people have their leg or foot ALWAYS moving (even though I do too!)…I just don’t know.

Why can’t I mind my own business, about this dance hooha?
Why am I so moody?

Maybe, I hope, I’m just PMSing.

For Margaret and Michael, again. Can you give me a sign to let me know they’re okay?

I don’t like that my stress rubs off on Julie…help us both to relax and have rhe best of the beautiful lives you’ve given us.

Here, how about some of these “prompts” to get my mind somewhere else?
Who do you get along with in your family?
Rorey – I like that Rorey and I can just…have fun.
Riley – I like that he can teach me things and isn’t a jerk about it.
Dylan – I don’t fight with Dylan but I’m not BFF’s with him…I don’t know.
I appreciate Mom a LOT. She’s the one who has been with me for every doctor’s appointment ever. And that’s pretty cool.
And Dad. Kind of a prick? Yes. But he works hard to make the money to pay for our heat, and food, and my medical crap.

Would you have wanted someone just like yourself for your mother?
No. Absolutely not. I might be able to appreciate the genuine kindness that came from her, but when it comes down to it, I need a mom with more of a spine than me. The thought of being a mom, even being married…it scares me.

When in your life have you experience the most growth?
High school for SURE. Seeing some lack of growth around me made mine stick out even more. It’s a good thing though. I’m mature. I have mature friends (mostly). I’m just glad I had that opportunity.

For Julie, of course.

Thy Will Be Done,
Meg

I hope I’m not the only one kind of disappointed in some members of our generation. They…don’t get it. They simply don’t see past their own worlds. They whine when they miss a meal, not even thinking about the people who’ve missed a week of meals. They spend money on purses, when that same money could feed a village in Cambodia. Come on. My prayer for them is that their eyes are opened. Even if they don’t stop to help those in need, just make sure they acknowledge them. Show them that their lives could be so so so so so so so so much worse. Please…it’s not good for a person to think that their world is the only world.

One of my favorite songs:
If we are the body
Why aren’t His arms reaching
Why aren’t His hands healing
Why aren’t His words teaching
And if we are the body
Why aren’t His feet going
Why is His love not showing them there is a way
Jesus is the way

I don’t understand Atheists. Weak Atheists I can respect, but it’s hard to respect someone who denies you. Seriously, dude, just look around. Think about your body. Think about the gift of life. The solar system. Anything. Could a human craft all this so beautifully? Where do you think this all came from? I haven’t heard a single good reason that would make me doubt your existence.

Sorry. I’m so sorry. I don’t know why I keep doing that. You know what I’m talking about.

Thank you for coming up with sleep. It’s a wonderful thing. Thank you.

For Julie. And Margaret and Michael.

Blessin’ the Lord my soul,
Meg

Emily Lippert…gone, just like that. And from passing out, too. I’m not sure what you’re trying to tell us, but I can’t figure it out. Rest in peace, Emily…

Please please please keep everyone warm. Everytime I step outside, visions of all the people freezing to death cloud me up and I get nervous. Really nervous. Because no one deserves to freeze. I just hope that everyone in the cold finds a way to warmth, figuratively and literally.

Again, prayers for Margaret and Michael.

I can’t stand people even hinting that “I think I’m better than others”. You know I’m not like that, right? I just feel like prayers for others need to be answered more than the ones for me…you know?

For Julie and her stomach, I don’t know what’s up. Also, make sure she eats plenty…it just gets me worried sometimes. Anyway…

For school, concentration, grades, for all the teachers

And thank you,
for Julie
for warmth
for love
for spontaneity
for the opportunity to learn
for Hondurans
for access to clean water
for the play, it really does make me happy
for my job, so glad to have it, however stressful
for snow. I, for one, think it’s beautiful. Everyone who doesn’t like it should just suck it up and enjoy!
for school
for friends
for my brothers
for cozy blankets
for this computer

Back to school today. I think. I hope. There’s the possibility of a snow day

For Julie, she asked me to pray for her. I always am Help her to sit back, let you take control, and relax.

For safety in this rough weather, please keep all drivers safe, and please God PLEASE let everyone stuck out in this weather find a place to stay.

For enthusiasm when we get back to school…

And a thousand million trillion bazillion million thanks for warmth. And Julie. Million gazillion.